Hello fabulous 30’s! I can’t believe it was already 10 years ago that I was turning 20, celebrating with family and friends on a small yacht in Mexico; planning to spend a summer in Europe, backpacking by myself, a trip that would greatly define the decade to follow; and completely oblivious to all the twists and turns my life was about to take.
Thinking about the last decade, how it brought me such unexpected joy and wonders, pain and growth, and so much love and passion…I can’t help but to get so excited about what this new decade will bring, whatever that might be. Call me crazy, but as scary as uncertainty can be, I find it very exhilarating; something about not knowing what’s to come, fills me with a hopeful “anything is possible” kind of excitement; sure I have an idea of some things that may happen in my 30’s, like motherhood for example; but I now know the difference between planning for the road ahead and actually walking on it, a valuable lesson learned in my 20’s that I’m sure will come in handy in my 30’s.
In fact, it seems that life’s welcome to my big 3-0 was precisely a big reminder of such lesson. I had envisioned some kind of extraordinary celebration happening on my actual birthday, everything from skydiving to a lovely ocean view picnic had crossed my mind; yet instead I’m sick in bed, with a painful throat and a crackling voice. Last night, I started throwing a tantrum about it in my head, whining and feeling sorry for myself. Still woke up today with some of that negativity lingering around…and then, my husband opened a bottle of Moët&Chandon, brought me breakfast in bed and expressed all kinds of loving feelings; people starting reaching out to send me their best wishes; and guilt about my whining starting seeping through, washing away all the negativity and giving room for gratitude to fill me up.
So no big birthday bash for me, no extravagant trips or daring adventures; just a humbling reminder of the things that really matter in life, and how lucky I am to have them all.
Granted, I couldn’t just let my 30th birthday come and go without embracing the changes ahead in my own way, which translated to me chopping my long locks (which I’ll soon be donating to Locks of Love) into a cute angled hair bob that I’m really loving. New decade, new look! Of course, I wanted to unveil the new look with amazing photos of it, but since being sick hasn’t allowed me to carry out that plan, we’ll all have to settle for a quick snapshot taken with my iPhone. Don’t worry, I’m still committed to, sometime in the near future, bringing you some cute photos that will do justice to my friend Lino’s amazing hairstyling work.
Category Archives: Uncategorized
Dazed and Confused
Have you ever had any demons, of which you’re fairly aware of, haunted you for years? You have, right? I mean we all have our own demons we struggle with at some point or another in life, whatever they might be…right? Have you ever for the most part managed to lock them up somewhere deep in the back of your mind achieving a certain state of denial/avoidance/hiding? Have you ever had any of those demons come out of that deep locked up place you put them in and stared you right in the eyes, and no matter how much you try to look away or figure out how to locked them up again, you ultimately feel compelled to finally face them while also feeling incredibly afraid to do so?
That’s exactly where I suddenly and very unexpectedly find myself at the moment, right at the corner of dazed and confused. I won’t go into specific details about my own demons and current circumstances, because, well, they’re deeply personal and private (though I guess not quite as much after this post!); I’m definitely not comfortable sharing that much here on the blog and not sure I ever will. However, lying here in bed alone in the middle of the night, I feel like reaching out in hope that someone out there can relate to what I’m vaguely describing; and maybe, just maybe, even provide some comfort or interesting insight on dealing with this sort of thing, that I wanna believe to a certain extent it’s a universal human experience.
As much as a part of me urges me to find that damn lock again so I can stuff everything back in the back of my mind under an “ignorance (or in this case denial!) is bliss” sign, I know that’s not really what I want. What I want is to be free, because I now realize it wasn’t that I had locked the demons up somewhere, I had just locked them out; unintentionally creating a prison for myself in the process, a prison that seemed like a safe place to hide. But now I want to be free from that prison, I want to be free from those demons. I fear it’ll be a long and painful road to freedom, but I’m almost 30 years old, I’m too old to be playing hide & seek with my issues.
I actually can’t stop wondering why now, after decades of managing somewhat successfully to avoid dealing with these issues, all of the sudden one seemingly insignificant incident has broken all the locks and yanked me out of my hiding place…precisely now, 2 weeks before my 30th birthday. It almost feels like life telling me to grow the f*** up and get over it. Except, is it possible there might be things in life we can’t get over? In the face of certain realities we can’t change, maybe there’s no such thing as getting over them, maybe our only option is to learn to live with them, as painful as they are. And how does one do that? Does it mean learning to live with the pain forever? Or does it come a time when, even in the midst of a painful reality, there’s no pain anymore? Is that the ultimate sign of true healing? I don’t know…all I know is I want to find my way to those answers. I just hope I have the strength to handle them when I do.
Our Wedding: Gratitude
Ok, so I lied (accidentally!), this is the real last wedding related post. After I published the details of our reception, I realized I was missing a very important publication…the thank you’s to all the people that contributed to make our wedding just perfect.
First, I gotta thank the fabulous guy behind my bridal hair & makeup, my talented friend Lino Martinez. Not only is he a gem as a stylist, he is one of the kindest, sweetest people I’ve ever met and I’m lucky to call him a friend. He captured to perfection the look I had envisioned, which was natural and effortlessly pretty. If you are in the Phoenix area, you can find him at Park Avenue Blow Dry Bar & Salon… I promise you, once he does your hair, you’ll never let anyone else touch it ever again!
Then comes a huge heartfelt thank you to the talent behind our wedding photography, my friends Steven & Clarissa Toupin. Steven is the one with a passion for photography, the eye behind the camera, but his lovely wife Clarissa played his assistant for the day, and together they proved they’re a match made in heaven in more levels than the clearly obvious. They were so diligent in making sure they captured every moment and every detail all throughout the day. I knew they would be awesome, but they surpassed every expectation I had. I keep insisting on Steven becoming officially a professional photographer because so far photography has only been a hobby in his life, but he’s so talented and professional, he really needs to start offering up his services to the general public. I feel so fortunate he agreed to be our photographer on our special day.
Finally, a big fat thank you goes out to my bff’s, my girls, the ones I can always count on: Dalia Bahena, Ann Tyburski, Mariana Oropeza and Artemisa Salinas. They’ve been there for me through thick and thin for years, and on my special day, they made sure everything at the reception looked like I had planned. My wedding flowers were all DIY, from my bouquet (another thanks to my dear Lino, he also helped me on this one!) to the centerpieces, and they were the ones to set up the flowers and decorations in the dinning room. They did such a fabulous job, the flowers looked exactly like I had pictured, and everything looked just beautiful. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you friends! An added thank you goes to my girl Dalia, who was my right hand person all day, helping with this and that, putting up with my bossiness without a single complaint…there were no official bridal party titles given, but she truly played the role of my maid of honor, and I can’t thank her enough.
So, thank you, thank you, thank you all for making our wedding just perfect! I am forever grateful to have had you all been such a big part of this special day, and even more grateful to have you all as dear friends.